EYE OF THE STORM

I was talking to someone close to me the other night who has lived a long life, accomplished many things to provide for her family, been through more than you can imagine... took a deep breath and said this to me:

"....Some nights I lay awake thinking about what I've truly accomplished in this lifetime? What did I do? Who did I become?" 

I didn't know what to say. 

This person whom I've looked up to my entire life was asking such a deep question that didn't know how to even attempt to respond. 

I proceeded to tell her that she created a home, a family, she served so many people in her job, she helped raise me and my sister. She was everything and MORE to me when the road through my childhood was so rocky, she was the anchor for stability. She so easily kept our minds off what was really going on. She was the feeling of home and always will be. 

How was this person was questioning her accomplishments? 
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Currently sitting here, outside on my patio as a big summer storm swirls in around me. To the left and right are both massive thunderhead clouds and I'm right in the middle, straight up, blue sky -- in what looks like the eye of the storm feeling an utter connection to the universe saying, "it's ok"
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I do not know what to make of it all, I want her to know how much she has meant to me my entire life. 

I also took it as a major wake up call. 

I sometimes want to yell up to the skies, WHY! WHEN! HOW! JUST SHOW ME!!!!

The utter frustration of everything makes my head spin. ALL of the things I want to do and what feels like very little time. The days go faster than ever now and when I ask elders why that is, they said repetition and similarity. Each day is the same, for the most part.

You get up, make coffee, drive to work, sit in shitty cube, listen to people bitch about their job, do work that somedays makes no sense, leave right at 5pm, sit in traffic, complain to your husband about the bitching employees, make dinner, work out, go to sleep. Sound about right? We're all SO damn unhappy with how things are playing out and so many of us DON'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT!

Really! Just complain and put the spotlight on bosses and middle managers who are just running the rat game themselves and equally as unhappy because they TOO had dreams. They too probably don't want to be there or work with you. 

I heard the follow statement one time that completely changed my life. 

It's EASY to get a job, any job once you're out of college. They want you, they're hungry for you to clock in, clock out, sell your short lived soul here on earth but you my friend, need to know you're worthy of so much more. You have two choices; work for someone else or work for yourself, that's it. 

Try for a moment to turn the tv off and stop watching other people live their lives, LIVE yours. Do what you love the SECOND you leave the office. Gain skills and master your abilities so you won't be sitting at the very late stages of your life asking, "what did I do?" DO it now while you still have time.

It isn't in my interest to live in the 9-5 box, or any lines for that matter. I seek color and individuality. And while so many things scare the utter shit out of me, I DO IT anyways. I trust that no matter what, the divine universe has my back and that I need to follow this pull and preach...because for someone, somewhere to know that if they even have a glimmer of this feeling in their system to chase the hell out of it. 

I'm not a meditation guru, but I created a youtube series on it.
I'm not a photographer but I self taught myself from again, youtube.... FREE!
I'm not a nutritionist, I wanted to lose weight and found a community and methods that worked for me.
I'm not a personal trainer but I give you one hell of pep talking and will be with you from day 1 to day 365.
I'm not a life coach but I seek to help people break free from their limiting beliefs.

I am myself, which is who I'll be this entire life for a long as I get on this planet. 

I will make my lifestyle my career.
I will continue to grow and gain certifications in things I find interesting.
I will help others find their way in the exactly as I found mine, through self development.

WHEEW! Let me shake my wrists for a second!

Feels good to proclaim that, let go and shed some barriers! Step into the light and when the eye of the storm suddenly surrounds you, look up, it's bright skies are straight ahead. 

I want to hear from you now, what is it that was an ah'ha moment in your life? What did you do to overcome or change? 

xo, Seana // The Bohemian Blonde